I remember a professor during my early years in college. She said, "Ngayon pa lang, maghanap na kayo ng magiging boyfriend/girlfriend nyo dahil siguradong hindi kayo makakahanap pag nagtrabaho na kayo, lalo na sa auditing firms."
That's practical way of inserting lovelife in one's career. Better find one before the career starts (as how it was explained). Well, I guess, for me, it might be too late.
Lately, a lot of family friends have been visiting us (ever since my dad arrived from abroad). I have been tremendously placed on "hot seat" everytime they have this "talk". Questions like "Wala ka pa ring boyfriend?", "Ilang taon ka na? Bat wala pa?", "Maganda ka naman ah, pwede ka nang magpakasal!", and other headaching questions was thrown to me. Yet I somehow survived them all and took off the long conversation gracefully.
However, I'm still getting my head off my body with too much thinking, so I have put this into writing...
Here are my excuses, este, my reasons why I'm not dating:
- I'm already pre-occupied. Not only am I busy with Accounting majors, but I also got myself involved in tons of voluntary and extra-curricular activities that eats up my time. [Don't ask me to specify, my hands are full to count them all.] Oh well, I take responsibility for all of them and I have no regrets.
- There are no guys who are "man" enough. If a guy simply couldn't straighten-out his life, how could he share his life to me?
I remember one guy who said "I love you" to me, 8 years ago. I rejected him then. Later on, I found out that he didn't finish high school nor entered college. Now, he's married, got a child, and doesn't have good paying job.
- There is no sufficient "men" to choose from. If you have heard me reacting about gays, its because I have been discovering that my guy friends eventually became gays or bisexuals. (Read my blog "When My Male Friends Turned Gay" at http://animatica.multiply.com/journal/item/39) Now all other guys around me are questionable. Good looking guys are either taken or gays!
- I don't like guys who have low self-esteems. Sorry, but its hard for me not to compare myself with a guy who might be interested in me. He's a guy, he should somehow be better than me in one aspect or another. That's why I prefer older guys so I would stop comparing. And yes, no-brainer guys are definitely turn-off!
- Where are those "gentlemen"? I bet they are gone. Sitting guys ignoring standing old folks in MRT trains are living proof.
- I don't like guys who loves me by my looks alone. I'm talking about those guys who sees me then says he loves me in an instant just because I have chinky eyes, or I have long hair (sorry, the long hair is gone now), or I'm cute, or I look Chinese, Korean, whatever, etc. I'm not a trophy for display.
- Lurkers around are perverts. I'm talking about mIRC, mobile chats and other chatrooms infected by all sorts of creeps with bad intentions. Even if you get a decent talk, the person behind isn't. mIRC is one place where I could not get back to. How in the world could I possibly meet a decent one?
Oh well, getting a lovelife isn't overnight. There are times when I felt that it's too late for me. Simply because my path has already been laid and all I can do now is follow it, or else, im ruined.
[I'm talking about graduating, reviewing for CPA board, be a CPA, work at Punongbayan & Araullo for 2-3 years, then go abroad.]
Who knows what will happen to me then? I may end-up marrying an old folk or be an old maiden...
Or not! Reality bites.
